The Fearless Wordsmith

The  Fearless Wordsmith
The Master's Princess of Words

The Fearless Wordsmith

Welcome to my blog site my constant readers!

This site's name is a combination of the titles of my two books "Seasons of Emotions" and "Inner Reflections of the Muse". "Looking For Your Half-Orange?" was the original title which had to be reconstructed.

Read posts about life, love and relationships straight from the fearless wordsmith's mouth!

A joyous reading escapade peeps!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

The Glory Of Me Time

Yes, no man is an island but then there are times we need to reflect on things and "hibernate" like a bear to some place we can utterly call our "sanctuary". A place where you can be your own self once in a while, can be high up in the boondocks or the green dreamy  fields - a secret getaway immersing yourself in your own world, away from the hurried and hustle-bustle of our modern everyday lives. 

Some need more personal space than the others while a good number simply cannot detach themselves from their relationships even for just a moment, call that "clingy" or whatever it may be. ( I can also be guilty of this at times though) But all of us must  have this time to breathe and exhale!

There are individuals who cannot stand being alone for they have instilled on their minds that being solo is equal to being LONELY. Well, if one cannot enjoy his/her "me time", one cannot eventually take pleasure in being with the company of other people.

I've made up a quote on being alone : " It is in aloneness that we can discover much about ourselves. " If you are one who makes your significant other  your world, often depending on the other person in order to be happy, in my humble and modest opinion, it ain't healthy for a relationship. You can make your bond grow by exploring other things outside your relationship. Developing your skills, engaging in your fave hobbies and stuffs.(sketching, yoga, poetry, martial arts or perhaps creating a website)

If I could have a whole day of my "Me Time", I'd prefer to be amidst the waves and warm sand in a beautiful secluded beach where I could gaze at the setting sun at the far horizon. With seagulls soaring through the golden skies, tides dancing as I find a cozy place to sit by the shoreline. I could then compose poetry or sketch (which I haven't done for  quite a while). What a scene to behold!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Magical World of Santa

     This was supposed to be a feature article for our local community  newspaper years ago but landed here instead on my blog site this year. Maybe there is a purpose  behind it for me to be able to reach a larger audience- to awaken the kid-at-heart in us all as I share with you one of Santa's sanctuaries situated our beloved city of Antipolo.

     As Christmas ushers in, we cant help but reminisce our childhood days. But even if years have passed us by, we still remain young at heart for Christmas is for children. How many of us believe in jolly, old Santa? St. Nicholas or Santa Claus to many, is a well-loved figure during the Yuletide season. When did you guys realize it was just your parents putting all those gifts inside the Christmas stockings? Besides being upset , we can't experience a White Christmas here in the tropics and enjoy going to a winter resort which obviously we aren't blessed with, there are still exciting ways to celebrate and get on our groove this season without the real snow that I'm dying to see since I was 10.

     Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. At the heart of Antipolo City is a Christmas sanctuary inside quaint Jardin de Miramar located at 276 San Jose Extention, Barangay San Isidro, Antipolo City.

     For those Santa Claus enthusiasts, Casa Santa is an enchanting place to visit nestled under the canopy of nature. If your opt for a fun-filled, different kind of Christmas retreat, then get ready to step into a magical world!

     Lets start our tour outside the house first. Upon entering the garden, a replica of an antique, wooden Noahs Ark stands majestically which was restored into a play/dining bar area for those visitors who prefer to dine outside and enjoy the cool breeze and a natural ambience.  The 50-year old, 30-footer fishing boat is not just another facility of Jardin de Miramar, this lovely piece of art also draws attention from visitors. Jardin de Miramars natural landscape is attributed to 1970 CCP Philippine Artist Awardee, Tony Leano together with works of art by Philippine National Heritage Awardee, Ed Castrillo, 2006 TOYM Awardee Michael Canio and international light designer, Shoku Matsumoto, Ral Arrogante and the Earth Artists of Antipolo City. Thats just part of our magical tour.

    Now, lets step into Santas enchanting house. An internationally-recognized Santa Claus collection that houses more than 1,500 Santa figures, coming from 50 different countries, Casa Santa is not just your ordinary, traditional stuffy museum but a fun-house that allows you to inspect closely each item and actually play with them! The owner is an avid Santa Claus collector, ardently  purchasing Santa figurines, collectibles and merchandise from around the world in each of her travels. Still up to this day, the white-bearded man collection is continuously increasing in number!

    The Casa Santa was remodeled from a family rest house into a Santa Claus museum way back in 1992, by folk architect, Rosario Encarnacion Tan. The breathing museum was perennially featured on TV documentaries and in December 2005, was also featured on international television thru Associated Press. Not just a party venue, but an ideal place for educational trips, kiddy parties and even weddings. You need not wait for the Christmas season to drop by this dreamland, for it is Christmas all year-round here! Break away from your usual Yuletide malling and have a grandiose Christmas tour with your family and friends and behold the amazing and captivating collection of Santa figurines.

    Casa Santa in Jardin de Miramar is just one amongst Antipolo City's tourist attractions and so come and visit if you may! 

    Merry Christmas everybody! Ho! Ho! Ho!

Saturday, December 10, 2011

'Til Laughter Do You Part

I am an early bird who catches teeny weeny wormies each morning. And so here am I 6 AM at the office who considers my Friday a luck one at that since most of my students were absent but I do get paid staying at work,finished drafting this entry after overcoming what could have been a slight attack of the much dreaded writer’s block. Many are requesting that I blog more and so in the coming days I will! 

So what’s with the title you might ask. It’s all about having a great sense of humor injected in a relationship not particulary in a boy-girl thing but also in our dealings with other peeps.
I just have noticed even with my closest friends and acquaintances and those that I get to bump into each passing day that girls do get attracted and/or “magnetized” by goofy, funny guys. What do you think so folks? Maybe it goes without saying that even if a man isn’t that drop-dead gorgeous like a celebrity hunk or what-have-you, if he has this innate great sense of humor , he rocks! (this is just MHO- my humble opinion, though).

Being quick witted and can easily make someone crack up (but not a wacko) I think is one of the qualities that endears men to women. It suggests one isn’t boring and you wouldn’t have dull moments in your convos each time. Ask some girls and they would tell you they would want a guy who can make them do a belly laugh, one in whom they can be nuts with at certain times, can share funny jokes like teenagers if not like kids once in a while, or pick on each other’s bloopers. LOL Tongue (Ok even “corny” jokes are allowed- those that don’t seem to be funny at all but thanks for the effort. LOL ) Tongue

You might think I’m an all too serious gal but I’m not, go ask my boyfriend and my friends here I do possess crazy antics periodically. Haha ! ( Sometimes I believe I must get myself a straight jacket too, you know or lock myself up in a self storage)This is also one quality both me and my bf possess – we both like laughing a lot, that’s why at times we share the “crazy fever” via the comments we make on my blogs. We like sharing our happiness.

Life is meant to be enjoyed and so why not laugh our heart out once in a while? Even when things seem to go awry, having a positive outlook would get you going. Prevent wrinkles , crow’s feet from appearing on your countenance, look and feel young laughing. (though they’re part of the natural aging process) 

Well, maybe you peeps have heard of the laughing exercise? Keep on laughing! Smile

Saturday, December 3, 2011

3 Stages To Real Love

According to Aileen Santos of Relationships and Life Reinvention Coaching here in the Philippines, there are 3 main stages of love we have to go through before we can readily say it's REAL LOVE we are having.

Read on to determine at what love stage are you in now and if you ever would make it through the finish line to say you have found your TRUE LOVE! 

I have enumerated the stages and then tried to explain each in my own words and understanding) Tongue So, here they are :

1. Love is a feeling. It is in this stage where in we feel these butterflies in our stomach each time we meet that someone special when we are in the throes of a newly-found love! (feeling like high schoolers having their first crushes/loves Tongue ) We may share the same passion, dreams and ambitions and goals in life that makes the ride more thrilling and we feel excited as the relationship progresses. (honeymoon stage)

2. Love becomes a decision. - You woke up one day to realize you and your significant other really don't share the same passions and often have disagreement on things. You also got to discover you're exact opposites of each other BUT you still hold on anyway because of the mere fact that you chose to love him/her and his/her IMPERFECTIONS. Like what they say "To love is a decision".

3. Love is fueled by action. - In this stage, after you have totally accepted your partner for all his/her worth, you actively become supportive of one another's passions and dreams and being able to also understand his/her quirks and the stuff. Much more like agreeing to disagree on some things without actually having cat fights and the like. Smile Effort is put into the relationship and not just mere words or promises. Tongue Love needs to be given much effort to grow and is tested by time and circumstances. Smile

Aileen Santos stated and I quoted " In the end, Real Love is made up of all three things: Feelings, Decisions, and Actions. Just remember that in Real Love, it's your Decisions that *lead* to your Actions, which in turn create your Feelings. And not the other way around. ;-) The relationship you long for doesn't happen by chance, by accident, by coincidence, or by luck. Because YOU have more influence over Love than you think. ;-)"

We may need  junk removal to remove any unwanted "toxins" in our relationships in order to work it out 'til the end. And if it is meant to be and would land you in a happy ever after, it would be worth the effort!

If you will ask me, what love stage we are in, I can readily say me and my Prince are on stage 3! We are very supportive of each other's careers being both interested in the Arts and Music. It's quite thrilling and fun to continuously discover each passing day that we both love the same things (if not all) actually. 

Blog pic courtesy of my Prince's Wedding Photography

Friday, December 2, 2011

Can't Get Enough Of Your Love Babe

This topic just came up out of the blue while waiting for my next class at work. Can love really be measured? Are there any percentages involved once you've decided to commit yourself to someone? 

Some people tend to compare how much love their partners give them with their own "investments" into the relationship. An exact opposite of unconditional love? They say love is given freely and is never forced on anyone and if that's the case, it ain't LOVE! If we expect so much from our significant other and they fail us in one way or the other either emotionally, physically and in yet other things, we tend to harbor feelings of disappointments and dismay. But this doesn't necessarily mean we would love them less than before or would limit our loving ways.

On the other hand, their frailties and shortcomings doesn't necessarily connote they love us lesser, too. Each and everyone of us love and care in our own little and sometimes subtle ways.

A guy may not be too expressive in what he feels or doesn't say I LOVE YOU that often but his through his actions his gf knows how sincere and committed he is. It takes more than mere, mushy, sugar-coated words to let our love be felt and showed!

A lass may appear less involved in a relationship but it might not be in her personality to be all too clingy or dependent on her partner. But it doesn't mean she's not that into their relationship with her main squeeze. 

Others don't want to set up rules in their love bond while others simply prefer to set up grounds early on in a relationship so less disappointments, less conflicts they say. At least they know what each party is expecting from the other.

Isn't it odd though to tell your love " This is how I want to be loved...this is what you should do...these are your boy friendly-duties you are bound to do upon entering this agreement" LOL Tongue (why not then make a press release ? :P) That may sound all too demanding, don't you think so? Tongue (at times it takes just plain common sense for us to know what are our obligations in our relationships. Not unless we are too naive or shall we call dense to not to know how we can show our love and devotion). Tongue

A love relationship is not a power struggle between two individuals but instead a "pact" entered into by two consenting and responsible people who made a DECISION to love one another come what may.You "buy the whole package" once you decide to love the person, not in "retail"!

*** blog pic courtesy of my Prince's Landscape Photography

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

What's Stopping You? (The Age Excusitis Syndrome)

Get a hold of your life right now. Yes, right now! You say time is running out, slipping through your fingers  like fine dusts but then what are you merely doing? Procrastinating over things you could do in the NOW, holding back yourself - waiting for the right time 'til your age catches up on you . Then again, you make awesome, out of this world  EXCUSES - that you are already old  for such things, that you can't have the stamina to engage in this and that activity.

"Age excusitis" a term used to refer to an alibi to postpone in attaining a dream or goal because of one's "age" as used by David Schwartz, the author of "The Magic Of Thinking Big." Each one of us have our own elusive dreams in life that we always wanted to achieve but then at times, we should blame our own selves too, why we never quite get around doing them - we simply avoid taking risks, some would rather play it safe and even tell themselves, "I can't do it!" without even giving themselves a first try.

This syndrome can be magnified in various aspects of one's life be it in one's career shift, going on an adventure travel, getting the body one is obsessing about, going back to school and even FALLING IN LOVE (ever heard of "we are neither too young or too old to fall in love" ?).  According to Schwartz, at certain points of our lives, we tend to buy into that idea that we are either too old or it is too late to do something different other than staying put in our own comfort zone. And it's not just age but as well as social norms  and other's perception of what our role in life should be that may influence our decisions.

NOTHING SHOULD STOP YOU FROM CHASING A DREAM. There is simply no age limit to go to the direction  that you've always wanted. We can always reinvent ourselves and life has such an array of wide possibilities we can embark on. Part of us has this ageless mind ( no form no boundaries, no beginnings, no endings) that is beyond the physical aging process that is readily available if only we encourage ourselves to go and chase our own rainbows! 

So whether you are in your 20's , 30's  or pushing 40's or even beyond, you can jump-start on your new life ASAP! Maybe to some, they have unattainable dreams while they were still youngsters that even if they're grown older, they've made a pact ( like a business plan service) with themselves to fulfill them so they wouldn't have haunting regrets in their twilight years.While some start early in life reaching for their pots of gold, others are quite late bloomers but what matters is you gave yourself a chance to take on challenges in making your dreams come true.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

My Lover, My Best friend

It's but great to have someone you could get  vulnerable with in either difficult times and in goofy moments. A relationship I guess would be dull and dry if there ain't no humor injected once in a while in your conversations. It also helps that your significant other is your best friend - someone you could lean on. They say the ecstatic feeling of being in love lasts like about 5 years and after that, if there is no solid bond between a couple and no commitment to cement it, it would crumble down to pieces. 

How cool it would be if you could treat each other like close chums but at the same time be all-sweet to each other. Yes, I think nowadays many are caught up in a certain dilemma of finding the other shoe that fits them - one whom can they be compatible with. I believe that relationships end because they don't have a solid foundation which is FRIENDSHIP! If a structure doesn't have a strong pillar, it can  fall down out of the blue, be done and dusted by even the slightest "shake". It is through turbulent and rough times that a couple be tested if it will  remain strong or not. Petty quarrels over insignificant things, "tampuhans" (one being upset over things), jealousies, these are just some of the thing lovers undergo and much more complicated things.

Some relationships just come and go for they forget that it is essential that your lover should also be a friend. What is the purpose of having a bf/gf if you can't rely on each other and at the same time have fun together enjoying your similar interests, if there is? (what if a couple are exact opposites of each other, well that's another topic). 

Like any other kind of relationships, a love bond would go through some trials. How many do get married to their best friends?

After all the mushiness and honeymoon stages have faded away through the years, companionship and commitment as well as genuine friendship between a couple can help save and  keep a love alive! 

Finding a lover and a best friend in one might be likened to finding a needle in a haystack ( It's much harder as searching for a humble abode in free home listings) Each one of us have our own individualities  but when you meet the one who can be your confidant and Prince Charming at the same time, you're one of the few whose got a pretty good luck in your hands.

What Scary Movie Gave You The Creeps?

This is a late Halloween post folks :

And since it's Halloween, might as well write about some eerie stuffs though I know some don't dig them and just cringe at the mere thought. (some would even maybe try a self storage to hide themselves first)Tongue I composed this post just out of the blue after having a horror movies marathon yesterday. I have watched " Death of A Ghost Hunter", "The Legend Of Sorrow Creek" and "The Nun" and will continue to still see some more today.

Not a goth or something, I simply love frightening flicks and even adore the Master of Terror, Stephen King's masterpieces! Smile Got a cd of his classic "Salem's Lot" and a multitude of his bestselling books in my room cum mini library. I am also into paranormal phenomena maybe because I got this third eye that I don't wanna develop, though. Tongue I'm too sensitive to feel things around me. Tongue

Some here might know about the infamous "The Exorcist" starring Linda Blair, well youngsters may not have heard of it but I'm sure some of your parents have watched it too. ( it's not that I'm "old", though Tongue ) The film is quite a scare, really. I guess that one gave me the creeps and was all goose-bumpy! Smile When I was younger, my family and I used to watch Christopher Lee's vampire movies in Wednesday Shockers.

I also dig mysteries in the "Twilight Zone" and Alfred Hitchcock's "Are You Afraid of the Dark? " Some would find it weird but then each one of us is weird in some ways. LOL Tongue

The Japanese horror flick, "The Ring", I don't find that frightening though, just surprising when Sadaku suddenly appears from inside the well or right through the television. LOL Tongue I'd rather find it amusing. TongueWhen you get to see our some of our local Pinoy horror films, they are not that scary too and some you would find somewhat funny. (in the tradition of Scary Movies) Wink I'm not much into zombie thingys, less on vampires now but I prefer those based on true stories like "Grave Encounters", which I yet to see. Smile

So folks, which horror flick gave you the creeps and kept you at the edge of your seat?

Happy Ghost Hunting! Tongue

Creepily yours,

Morticia Addams in behalf of my hubby Gomez Addams Tongue

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Sleeping Beauty, Hasn't Your Prince Arrived Yet?

At my age, I'm way past believing about fairy tale romances and meeting the ideal Prince. Having met different kinds of people around and having been to relationships ; witnessed other's who either succeeded or failed in their pursuit for the One, I can readily say, "there is no ideal Prince/ Princess."

As we humans are born imperfect, we all have flaws and frailties that our significant other should come to accept and love. (as i said before in my previous blog entry- Buy The Whole Package) The more we have high standards/qualifications before we can "hire" Tongue the One, the more we can get disappointed when each one we cross paths with in this avenue called life wouldn't fit in. ( some ought to go visit resume writing services online maybe to get good results) Smile Some would say it's plain "choosiness" or one is just waiting for Mr/Ms. Right who either got lost in the woods still finding their way or is not yet born into this world. LOL Tongue

I should have been married years go but then maybe it was just not yet meant to happen and that my exes weren't my destinies. Tongue I was yet to meet the One who's really my match and all. Smile waiting for the Right One is a good idea so you wouldn't rush yourself getting involved or taking the plunge at the spur of the moment or due to raging emotions that will just subside in the passing of time, and just regret it the rest of your life. Other times, it can also be a drag for it's quite exhausting- this cycle of life.

Whoever said that finding a lifetime partner would be an easy one? Others get all pressured with the time constraints - age, biological clock ticking, the world nearing it's end Tongue and of annoying friends and relatives who frequently ask dreaded questions of when are you getting married or having a child.

But we couldn't force things to happen if it ain't the right time yet, not the right person and not even the right place at times. These are just humble thoughts coming out of a lady's coconut shell. Tongue

Sunday, October 23, 2011

A Beautiful Mind

This ain't about the film starring Russel Crowe but rather about one's intelligence that can either attract or intimidate even the toughest of hearts.

Don't you love it when your partner is gifted with a beautiful mind? Or do you make such a great fuss if she can outsmart you in some ways? Maybe some men get intimidated with intelligent women when they cross paths and easily drop off any interests they might  be harboring once they learn she's smart alecky.

I guess some men still want to have greater grey matters between their ears  than their lady loves, call that male ego or something. But I'm not in any way generalizing since we have our own preferences and pet peeves, just merely pouring out my thoughts on this matter.

In my earlier posts, I asked if men get intimidated with women they like and how do they handle intimidating ones they meet. Based on my observations, own experiences and as experienced by my friends, intimidating women are  the ones most likely to have difficulty in finding their matches.

To men : Intimidating ladies don't bite and they are humans too like you with some insecurities hidden (somewhere in self storage software) within  themselves.

It can also be that a girl possesses a strong personality and may not be that intelligent but speaks her mind that some would be having second thoughts of approaching her, afraid of being rejected or be punched on.

A friend's ex boyfriend told her that  he fell in love with her mind (she's a poet) and not physically-wise.Can we just fall in love with one's intelligence without any physical attraction?

What to you, is someone who has a beautiful mind? One who always see the world in red-colored glasses or one who always say "YES"  to you  and doesn't even mind being branded a wall flower as long as she's always agreeing with what you are saying ? (Would you like one who mimics you or one who is likened to a parrot with automatic recorded replies you like  hearing each time? )

Who likes a boring partner anyways? It can be that one is just an introvert but has actually great ideas kept in his mind, just needs pushing so he can come out of his shell. I believe we like to have great exchange of meaningful if not scholarly convos with our significant other once in a while and also have moments of  being goofy to spice things up a bit.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

My Coney Island Ice Cream Memoirs of Childhood

      They say that writers have vivid memories and wild imaginations. “A writer remembers.” Every minute details of days gone by are all kept intact in our minds. What were my earliest memories? Though years have come and passed me by, my childhood days are still worth reminiscing. Born to a simple yet loving family, as the eldest child, I’ve experienced to play all by myself with no steady playmates to stay. I was confined in my solitary world for four years after which my sister was born. I  can still remember, up to this very minute I can picture myself playing in our yard near a mango tree- an old mango tree, digging the soil, talking to my “imaginary” friend at that time while Mom is busy cooking in our kitchen. That tree is my “tree”. (No need to look up on free home listings, it's right there out our yard) It has witnessed how I grew up and withstood many storms in this lifetime. At that time our house was built inside a yard full of different trees and there were even stories of supernatural creatures that came through the darkness at night but unlike other kids my age, I simply ignored them. 
     A tough, brave kid you might say as haunting stories like that don’t readily scare me but rather I fancy them as I weave wild imaginations of other beings that lived around our house. My “tree” they said was inhabited by a half-horse, half-human creature from the underworld! No, he cannot possibly own my tree! There might be giants there lurking in the dark night on a full moon and vampires roaming around searching for their preys. And so, that is how I came to love Stephen King!
       Some nights, my sister and I would sneak on the bed with our father as he tells us stories about his own childhood spent in the countryside. My dad is really my first storyteller and up to this day, he loves it when his children listen to whatever story he unfolds.
       How I also missed going to the carnival with my family during my primary school days. Right after we buy jumbo hotdog waffles and delicious Coney Island chocolate ice cream! (anybody here who’s familiar with Coney Island ice cream?) Those were the days…embedded in my heart, sweet memories I can go back to from time to time. Memoirs I can even tell to my future children and maybe grandchildren as well in the future.I’m gonna be the storyteller by then.

Going Gaga Over Sponge Bob

  “Are you ready kids?” “Aye, aye captain!” What are the things running through a child’s mind while watching cartoons on TV? Well, I was an avid fan of the muppets and characters of Sesame Street, Astro Boy, Care Bears, Rainbow Brite when I was a kid. Fairytale characters, Snow White, fascinates me as well as Sleeping Beauty and the quests of their Prince Charmings to get through them. But at the time, I don’t mind them sharing the same “Prince Charmings”. (So, how come their true loves are called “Prince Charming”, is he the same guy?) Those were the days when cartoons are “tamed”, sweet and with happy endings.
     Nowadays the trend is kinda different with “weirder” characters, their appearances not necessarily the conventional pretty and handsome faces but rather out of this world. Think of Shrek, he is loved by many though he’s not gifted physically.
    Can you imagine yourself living in Bikini Bottom? Inside a pineapple house? I don’t know when did the craze over Sponge Bob began and what makes it tick to children and why they simply adore him. Other characters you would find having outrageous looks are: Patrick Star, Sponge Bob’s kinda “na├»ve” bestfriend; Squidwort, the hot-tempered co-worker and neighbor; Mr. Crabs, the boss of Crabby Patty with Gary, the cat-sounding snail pet of Sponge (why “cat-sounding” you might ask me. Well, he says “Mawww” and do snails sound like this?)
     Sponge Bob didn’t appeal to me for a long time not because I got over watching things just for kids only but then I didn’t really get to notice him until my very own niece introduced him to me. You might laugh at me if you’ll learn that I find myself anticipating seeing him everyday as my niece sets herself up in front of the TV every afternoon. Well, there’s something in him that I find cute and amazing coz maybe of his childlike innocence and looking at the bright side of things, forgiving  those who do him wrong and being a good ‘ol pal to his best friend whatever happens. It was 4 years ago that he became a star in my article entitled “Of Sponge Bob and Leadership” listing the traits he possesses that can be the same good qualities of being a good leader. ( He has certain " quirks" that can topple down even great leaders as I have mentioned in my article and won't even need free classifieds to search for work - he is one indispensable employee! Now, that's another story.)

Friday, October 7, 2011

Girly Traits That Drive Men Away

It is a known fact that men simply adore us women. But there could be some behaviors we exhibit that might drive them away. In moderation, it's ok but taken into extreme can absolutely turn your guys off.

Here are some girl quirks  that can drive your men insane.

1. Pessimistic Jane - Complaints, rants once in a while is but fine. But whining all the time would drive your man and even good friends away. Who would want to be around a whiner anyways?

2. Amanda the Nagger - Tell me about someone who loves naggers. When it is simply annoying being nagged by our Mom's when we were kiddos, why would men want to hang around with someone who does the same thing too when we've grown up? Often badgering about things make them rebel more instead of doing things properly or faster. (I know nagging is innate in us women, but you're his gf/wife NOT his Mom.) And also, you're not his Master/boss who can always pick on lousy maid service he offers.

3. Indecisive Amy - Women are known to change minds faster than a speeding bullet but men don't like last minute dropping of plans. They would wonder if you're really interested in them if you can't constantly make up your mind.

4. Insecure  Jenny - They say that "confidence is sexy". ( Just don't overdose on it, too though) and lacking in it ain't pretty, too. It's not healthy comparing yourself to other people and not having enough faith in yourself.

5. Childish Farah - Showing your inner brattness could be very annoying to men. The same with having tantrums when you can't win in argument with him or can't have your way on things you want. Actually, being too childish ain't cute, honey.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Is Our Longing For Love A Sign Of Desperation?

Is our longing for love a sign of desperation? Desperation to be with the One intended for us, the one whom we want to share our lifetime with together?It is but human nature to feel this emptiness when we haven't find our true love yet for ages while the others are already coupled up and cooing sweet nothings to each other in front of us.:) Oh, get real! ( we can even find this in ringcentral reviews, kidding)We feel envious of course despite all the denials!

As a modern woman who can be independent and take care of one's self, you can't deny the fact that there are things you secretly wish for in life. (this is not just for women though). :) We may say that we can feel complete without a partner for our happiness isn't dependent upon another person. We try not to be defined or gauged on based on our relationship status.

But once we are within the comforts of our homes, at the four corners of our humble abode, we secretly hope for our ONE TRUE LOVE! :) Even the most accomplished, the woman/man with a strong personality is still hoping againts hope of being in a loving relationship! To have someone to grow old with like Adam Sandler's song Grow Old With You :) To be with someone who will accept us despite our fragilities, frailties and tantrums.

We feel this longing not out of our weaknesses or desperation but it's encoded within our blue print because we are HUMAN!

There is a time for everything under the sun though. Young ones mustn't rush themselves in finding themselves lifetime partners when a lot is still in store for them. When you get past the age of 30's or 40's maybe that calls for a little desperation. Just kidding!

Young ones and for those who are actively searching your TRUE LOVE is just right around the corner! A matter of time, chance or luck or whatever you call it, the One will arrive.

Despite love's complexities and fragilities, true love still exists! Just give a look at your parents who grew old together. Those old couples who remained sweet beyond their years, wrinkles and all that.

To accompany this blog below is a link to a song by Peter Gabriel, Book Of Love:

Happy reading!

*** blog pic courtesy of my bf's Wedding Photography Works

A View To A Kill (Crimes Of Passion)

You might ask what prompted me to write a topic such as this...well series of news stories on  the boob tube,online and on paper on murders and suicides made me to blog about this social issue that's been sadly occurring at different parts of the world.

What entices one to commit such a  heinous act like suicide and murder? Crimes of passion - they are all over the newspaper nowadays.Recently, a  horrible occurrence in the Philippines left us dumbfounded when two teenage boys were killed/had suicide inside a mall - one killing the other then afterwards ended his dear, young life, too.There were even widespread rumors circulating that they were a homosexual couple. One possessing firearm inside the mall premises is also quite baffling since we know they implement strict security measures  before customers  can enter the mall. Well, that's another story. 

In Korea, as narrated by my students and as I have read, a lot of youngsters commit suicide because of pressure from school and/or not living up to the expectations of their parents and teachers. Not only do teenagers commit such a crime but even adults, even famous celebrities do so. One, having ended his life because of what the Netizens posted online degrading him and leaving stains on his reputation. Another  one actor in a famous love drama series and a good actor to boot, upon learning that his father was diagnosed as having cancer suddenly said bye-bye to the world by killing himself first. (my eyes rolling) Such a wasted life!

A similar committal of suicide left our neighborhood in sheer horror years ago, when one of the teeners shot himself right on his chest when he wasn't able to bear all those hurts and problems burdening him inside! To think that he's so young way back then and a promising future is ahead of him still. A major reason - he was neglected by his parents. Such as sad affair.Goosebumps on my skin and all hairs standing once I recall what had happened to the life of the poor boy.

Crimes of passion as experts say are causes of raging,  sudden outbursts of emotions out of anger, loss or guilt. Depression coming from personal problems, pressure from work, at home and in school are major culprits.Low anxiety level people normally have suicidal thoughts more often if they are left with no hope and all else seems gray and negative. They want to escape from this world thinking all problems would just go away if he makes his exit. (Do they even thought about that it's an act of selfishness on their part leaving their loved-ones just like that? )  

As for the youngsters, could it be a cause of alarm for parents and the rest of their family members to look after their children and siblings more? Yes, of course but we may not know what's bothering them if we don't get to talk to them or give them the time of day to let out their problems. (maybe if the have this free online storage to dump in their burdens to, it might help them unpack and feel lighter )

I believe what these kind of people need is someone to REALLY LISTEN to them and all. Not someone  who will judge them and control them BUT to UNDERSTAND what they are going through.

God Will Publish Your Love Story

As what was said : " We are the architects of our own future! " All those dreams and ambitions can  be attained by having perseverance and hard work.  But above it all, God designs the blue print and one thing more, He is the mighty author of each and everyone's love story! (this post reaches out to all and  not just those believers  for whatever religion or sect you may belong to, we know that there is a Supreme Being looking out for all of us)

I would share with you below a post from Aileen Santos of Relationships and  Life ReInvention  Coaching here in the Philippines ::

"Dear Singles:



But sometimes there are reasons why
you can't see this happening yet:

1) You could still be HOLDING ON
to an OLD CHAPTER of the story;
you're afraid to LET GO, and
it's preventing you from turning
to the next new page.

2) God has already written something
about the way you need to GO
or the way you need to GROW
... and you haven't followed
that part of the story yet. Or

3) You keep taking the pen from HIM,
insisting on your own version
of what you want to happen.

Yes, God IS DEFINITELY writing your love story.

But you have to find out what YOU need to do
to actively live out your part in the tale."

Whether we may agree or not with the above mentioned factors, we couldn't deny the fact that she has some points there.

Those who cannot totally move on from past failed relationships find it hard to find the One for them. Or if they have met someone, they aren't healed yet of the past hurts and can even have this rebound thing which is unfair to both parties. End the old chapter, don't turn around the pages again but if you have to, just reminisce the good 'ol memories it has brought to your life and how it has changed you as a person.Then you can proceed to the next  chapter of your life about to unfold! (you can even set your plan first more so like a business plan service on how to meet the One out there)

Chain of events can happen but all these failures and heartaches along the way help to mold you into a stronger individual, to help you grow. When one fine day comes and you're all set bumping into the One, you can fully enjoy the moment as you are now WHOLE as a person. BUT love yourself first! GROW as your own individual and enjoy life. You can have so much more to offer to your prospective relationship this way.

The third reason perfectly describes quite a number of us who force things to occur even if we know it ain't  meant to happen or is not really for them in the first place. Yes, it's true that we search for our own HAPPINESS  but if it's not in the cards, acceptance along the way is needed and we opt to just move on to the next one that comes along that is truly meant to be for us. Also, for every person that comes into your life, there is a corresponding purpose behind meeting them at the crossroads, don't you think so?

Ever heard the famous cliche : " Each one of us have our own match." ? If you believe in this, you'd still have high hopes that one day, you would ultimately find yours, too.

BUT as in the last line says, as we are the characters/artists in this novel called life, we have to do our "roles" and perform well on the stage - we should know what/who we really want in life and the kind of partner we intend to be with the rest of our lives.The One whom we will commit ourselves with.

And one more important thing - LOVE is given freely, not to be begged for and is not selfish. If we ultimately search for someone who can just fill in the empty spaces in our lives, someone who will make us happy, ( notice if it's always  "someone who can..." "someone who will..", instead of "someone I can..." and "someone whom I can share.."), we are just satisfying OUR own selfish desires rather than giving LOVE away like a gift.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

We Are But Pilgrims In This World

        Have you ever asked yourself what's the purpose of your mere existence in this world? Have you ever wondered what's your true mission in this life? Life starts at your conception inside your mother's womb..a wondrous miracle , life springs out of another being...then comes the day you were born and your mom hears your very first cry as tears well up her eyes upon seeing your little countenance and fragile cute fingers... It is said that each and everyone of us have our own purposes here on earth - be it to touch other people's lives, to inspire others through your words or worthy causes organized; to love and be loved, to dance like there's no tomorrow; to weep and experience pain... all our paths are intertwining and in every step of the way through our journey, we meet at the crossroads...we are all connected in some ways...what one says or does affects or influences people around him...
           Life is a journey - sometimes a short one and can be a long ride pilgrims we travel through life's highways criss crossroads meeting at some point in time, must part at the corners as we meet other people again.This cycle goes on and on til we reach our final destination...
          Life is a constant change is composed of different seasons, each one having distinct characteristics that we may either enjoy or hate...our pilgrimage  through our entire lives entitles us to experience the joys and sorrows this world of us brings.A season of happiness - feeling as if you're on top of the world not mindful of those around you for you wanna feel that once in your life then suddenly without any clue, a season of grief, surmountable sadness - loss of a lover, family, a friend or loss of a precious job, your bread and butter...your whole world then suddenly collapses before you, as if the heavens closed its gate behind you and you were left stranded and helpless in a deserted island, a dark and lonely place...
          Yes, it's hard to cope up with any loss especially if they mean everything to the pilgrim goes through his journey, he might lose a thing or two along the way but must move on and carry on his travel and tell himself my time has come and  finally reached my abode! These experiences taught me how to be a stronger pilgrim - to battle life's up and downs, to face any obstacle that would dare keep me from reaching to my own sacred place, also throw away the excess baggage or use a free online storage to dump them there ...til then my pilgrimage has just begun...

***blog pic courtesy of my bf's Nature and Photography Works

Lizzy's Treasure Trove

NOTE: In this blog, the lead star is not me but my “companions” when I’m drifting into my own world.
      They say diamonds are a girl’s best friend but I can trade them just to have a collection of books from my fave author! I don’t need sparkling jewels to wear on my neck, wrists or fingers, don’t need precious gems nor a 24-carat gold…what I treasure most are books, books, and still loads of books – from horror to mystery, sci-fi, detective stories and inspirational – these can be found in my secret treasure trove. What you can chance upon entering my little room are tons of Stephen King’s masterpieces that I have collected through the years and still counting… I dunno what exactly drove me to his creations like The Dark Half, Hearts In Atlantis, Dream Catcher, Misery, The Stand, Gerald’s Game and some of his collections – Nightmares and Dreamscapes, Skeleton Crew and Night Shift but they do make me feel good (maybe I’m a real creep after all). My latest from the Master of Terror himself are Stephen King Goes to The Movies and Just After Sunset (as a birthday gift for myself recently).
You can also find science fiction books which are movie-tie ins such as they were made into blockbuster movies too like King’s novels ending up on the big screen – Contact, The Fifth Element, Close Encounters of the Third Kind by Steven Spielberg, Alien, etc. Some detective stories with touches of mysteries on their plots like – The Devil’s Advocate, Seven, John Grisham’s The Pelican Brief and The Juror among others. These themes keep my adrenaline rush and boosting my wild imagination into full gear. Three of Mitch Albom’s inspirational books I own too – The Five People You Meet in Heaven, For One More Day and Tuesdays With Morrie. Books that will touch your lives and the ones you’ll read repeatedly. I may not live to be a novelist but I do appreciate these genres. The authors have distinctive styles of their own. Others you can find in my room cum mini-library are classical literary pieces – Pride and Prejudice of Jane Austen, The Hunchback of Notre Dame of Victor Hugo and Mary Shelley’s Frankeinstein. I also have a collection of short stories of English and American writers like Ernest Hemingway, Leo Tolstoi and Guy de Maupassant. I must admit it takes me months to finish reading the latter pieces because of their deep English expressions and melo-dramatic dialogues. I'm also a big fan of Paulo Coelho, having a collection of his books which aren't complete yet - The Witch of Portobello, The Devil and Miss Prym, The Fifth Mountain, Eleven Minutes. Another favorite true story is Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray and Love which was also made into a movie. (now this has turned into wix reviews of books)
I may say I’m not like some typical women who crave and go gaga over love novels of Danielle Steele or books of Mills and Boon before. I’m just not much into them for I find them boring! Oops! Sorry but that is just my opinion, no personal grudges. I’m more into complicated plots that keep me on the edge of my seat and makes me want for more. As I check out my collection of books I can’t help but feel nostalgic of the feelings they brought me when I got to read them each time. I found myself dumbfounded to learn that I have such a huge collection now over the years and if I would calculate their sums would cost a fortune! For me they’re one great investment that I could pass on to my future children. I could give up and sell everything but not my precious treasures that I come to live with in my lifetime.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

From "Almost-a-Couple" To Buddy Zone

What if you get to realize that the one you are romantically-inclined with before could just well be a friend for keeps? A prospective love gone sour? You were once into this MU (mutual understanding) thing but eventually things had a  turn around. This could  happen  after some things didn't work out between the two of you, or someone got back together with an ex or something to that effect - a change of heart.  Yes, it's tough having to be still act civilly with each other after the love bug has left you both. But if you decide to stay as  buddies still, you must know how to make it through the transition again. 

Below are some tips to ease up your change of "zone".(these ain't found in 1800gotjunk reviews but just my own suggestions)

1. Know your limitations. If before you used to be a "cuddly", almost-lovers, refrain yourselves from having "mushy moments". It is but proper to be aware of your boundaries unless you want to be labeled as "friends with  benefits". (now that's another issue). Some are used to calling each other "pet names" also but you wouldn't want to get stuck in that endearment calling long after you meet your prospective lovers who might misinterpret rather than finding it cute. So, maybe it would help to quit that, too.

2. Allow yourselves enough time to overcome your feelings for each other. Even if you were never an "official couple", it doesn't mean that your feelings weren't real and just superficial. Give yourselves space first. Saving the friendship would only work out if both of you are ready to move on.

3. Recite the mantra " He's just a friend. He's just a friend. " Start telling yourself and condition your brain that he isn't "the one who got away" and go back to referring to him as one of your friends.

4. Go out with him WITH your pals. To help your way back to your friendship mode, hang out with him together with your other peers. Friends would be there to act as " buffers" during awkward moments.It would also help program your mind perceiving as just one of your buddies.

5. Wish each other's happiness. You don't have to set each other up dating other people but merely wishing for each other's happiness is but nice. If he decides to get back to the dating game again, support him and if you're quite interested with another guy, go for it and don't be guilty of anything since you are  both free in the first place.